Who's The Pussy Now?

As my old roomy would say, Well, Well, Well...

...I saw two speeches tonight. One guy gave his in a packed arena with 20,000 screaming fans like some rock concert, with a reported 15,000 more who couldn't get in waiting outside, and they weren't even serving beer, and at the same venue that will be the site of the "other team's" convention this summer (Ouch!)...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GXaVFdTA_fU

...the other guy gave his in the Pontchartrain Center with a few stiffs that looked like they were pulled out of a croche convention. Seriously, they were about as enthusiastic as golf announcers.
Where is the Pontchartrain Center you might ask? Well, although located in the pretty middle/lower-class town of Kenner, just a short drive north of the lake is the whitest most wealthy suburbs (that explains the unenthusiastic stiffs) of, let's see, what's that city?...the one where there was that big storm, and all the negros had to sleep and shit in the big football dome because, well, because they weren't white, that, and because the current administration is a bunch of heartless, incompetent fuckheads? Comon, I know this one, the city were you can drink all night, buy Crown at the grocery store, and see boobies for the low low price of plastic beads. Man I sucked at geography! You know, the city that our stupid dick of a president peered out the window of Air Force One to assess the damage, all for a photo-op that Cousin Karl insisted was important, OH, Yeah, that's right, New Orleans!

Honestly, Gramps, I think the lower 9th Ward would have been a more appropriate, moving venue for a speech of this nature on the biggest night thus far for the other party. Who's your campaign manager?

So, these two speeches, one was given by a guy who is going to need a tailor to undo the hem on his pants to keep his balls from showing...and I aint talkin about the senior citizen dealing with gravity issues either. If this isn't what a motherfuckin president should sound like, I'm movin to Canada!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=56wBIy8oFTc

...the other speech was given by a guy who can barely read the teleprompter. He must have flunked public speaking. And do you get the feeling you're one of his grandkids when he talks? Oh my Jesus, and the tone of is voice is so, so, fuckin gay. Does this sound presidential?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bpQnJfElZvo

Hey, John InSane, your vagina is showing! What are the NASCAR-Gun-Toatin-Jesus voters to do? Well, when there is an Obama/Clinton ticket, there will be plenty of room on the flatbed.